Captain Planet, saving the world one pack at a time!

The other day me and my battle got relieved from our shift, so we grabbed our gear and loded up in the HUMVEE. I was driving and as we were approaching our FOB we came up on a bit of a traffic delay. There was a string of KBR service and delivery 18wheelers on the right side of the road and on the left side at the front of the line was an MRAP(mine resistant ambush protected) vehicle with a U.S. soldier on foot signaling for traffic to stop. The traffic consisted of a white haji car and me behind him.

The white car either wasnt paying much attention or didnt care becuase it didnt seem to want to stop for the soldier, but it finally did. I was paying attention and where I stopped there was a good 2-3 car lengths between me and the white car. Once that was over the soldier started waving the KBR convoy on, after half of them had gone by he stopped them and signaled for another MRAP to move in the middle. Then he signaled for the rest of the convoy to proceed and he jumped in his MRAP so that they could take up the rear.

At this point we have just been sitting there minding ourselves when I see the white car throw an empty pack of smokes out his window. I look over at my battle and say: I should make that guy pick that up. To which my battle replies with a laugh.

After sitting there for a long second I say F this, jump on the gas and as i start moving another car tries passing me on the right. So I hit the horn and swerve right pinching him off and pull up short behind the white car. I throw the HUMVEE in park, undo my seatbelt, jump out and close my door then jog over and pick up the pack of empty smokes and throw them back in the white car which scares the crap out of the haji driving. I then stare at the driver for a long hard second then I say with a pointed finger "KEEP BAGHDAD BEAUTIFUL".

I return to my vehicle put on my seatbelt, put it in gear and almost take off the white cars bumper getting around him cause of how close i parked.  Once we were on the FOB and driving back to our ready room, me and my battles conversation went like this

battle: so what did you say to him?
me: I told him to keep baghdad beautiful.
battle:(laughing) that was freaking awesome! I think you are my new favorite hero.
me: I should have had him pick it up at gun point.
We both have a good laugh after that.

So of course my battle has to tell the rest of the squad what happened and later on in the gym one of my troops comes up to me and says "hey Captain Planet". For a sec there I was huh? then I was aaahhhh BWAHAHAHAHA goooooooOOOOOOOO PLANET! with my fist in the air.